Archive for the 'Summer 2010' Category

June 16, 2010 | "Whoa whoa I gotta go...back to schoooool...again",3rd Semester,Creative Writing II,Life in General,Mentors,Prescott College,School Daze,Summer 2010,The 4-1-1 on Me

So, I’ve talked about my Creative Writing II (a.k.a. CWII) mentor’s feedback regarding the first 100 pages. Well, for the first assignment, I had to go chapter by chapter and define the major plot and the subplot. The first 100 pages is 9 chapters and the first few pages in chapter 10. Not even halfway into this exercise, I wanted to stop.

Subplot was winning.

And then the doubts crept in.

I stink.

I suck.

I’m doing this wrong.

I can’t turn this in, my teacher is going to laugh her ass off.

At this point, I’m going to have to write on a piece of paper

THIS IS ONLY A FIRST DRAFT

and hang it in front of me as a reminder.

I have a feeling Georgia is going to be both teacher and cheerleader.

June 10, 2010 | "Whoa whoa I gotta go...back to schoooool...again",3rd Semester,A Whole Latte Trouble,Book Two,Creative Writing II,Life in General,Mentors,Movie Queue,Prescott College,School Daze,Summer 2010,The 4-1-1 on Me,Writer Moment

It’s the second week of school and I got feedback from my mentor regarding the first 100 pages of Book 2 earlier this week.

The story lacks focus. You say your main plot is about the investigation into this fellow yet from what I can nearly 100 pages in, Draven has does very little to show the reader that she is this awesome, kick-ass informant. We see much more of her at school or with her friends just talking about “stuff” that is arguably sub-plot and fails to move the main plot along.

I see very little tension at all in the book. I assume as a reader that a book which focuses on a sleuth will have elements of tension, danger not only from the investigation itself but from Draven’s cover being blown. I also assume that in her role, she will make enemies. So, that also adds to the danger/tension. But I see none here. In fact, she is just hanging out like nothing is going on at all.

So, that is the plot, sub-plot and story-telling side.

There are some issues with redundancy and consistency. I’ve highlighted them in some cases and made comments on others.

There are cases when I feel the dialogue is forced. Some pages of dialogue go on for too long and fail to move the story to the next level.

Also it is hard in some places to know who’s talking in your dialogue exchanges. Watch for it.

Consider your pop-culture references and how they might date you as an author and how a reader may take that reference. There are many. While they may be funny to you, your readers are teens today.

Consider your use of stereo-typical representation of Hispanic youth. “Chica, Chiquita, etc.” Just make sure that you are 100% comfortable with these references and they are genuine.

There’s a scene in CLUELESS where Brittany Murphy’s character said something hurtful to Alicia Silverstone and Alicia responded with, “That’s way harsh, TY.” That line was running through my head after reading this. LOL.

But I have to remember that it’s a first draft. The novel, not the feedback.

It’s not going to be good the first time. Nor is it going to be good the second, third, or fourth time.

It’s a story that I completed some time last year and then promptly put away because I didn’t want to look at it anymore. It was a hard write. Then I pulled it out—I don’t remember when—and started editing it. I got midway through Chapter 8 before putting it away to start Book 3 (NaNoWriMo 2009 Fail).

I wish this was the only class I was taking this summer, because I won’t be as focused on the process as I normally would be. The revisions won’t be as good as I want them to be, or should be. Yeah, I know it was my bright idea to create a book revision college course, but even though my concentration is going to be pulled in three different directions, I still expect this to be a learning experience I can carry through to future books.

Technorati Tags: CLUELESS, Brittany Murphy, Alicia Silverstone

June 3, 2010 | "Whoa whoa I gotta go...back to schoooool...again",3rd Semester,Adv Children's Lit,Life in General,Prescott College,School Daze,Summer 2010,The 4-1-1 on Me

One of 3 classes I’m taking this summer is Adv Children’s Lit. We were directed to a suggested book list but are encouraged to come up with our own. This is a reading-intensive course and I don’t know how many books we’re required to read–yet–but I want to have plenty to choose from.

My favorite children’s book is Where the Sidewalk Ends by Shel Silverstein. My parents gave this book to me when I was young and I still have it. Love the quirky, funny poems. I’ll be reading more of Shel’s works during this course, but I’m needing your help in coming up with a great list of board, picture, and chapter books. So

What’s your favorite children’s book? What are you reading to your kids right now?

Put your answer in the Comments section. If you’re an author, feel free to mention your own book as well. Thanks for your help.

Technorati Tags: Where the Sidewalk Ends, Shel Silverstein

June 1, 2010 | "Whoa whoa I gotta go...back to schoooool...again",3rd Semester,Financial Mgmt,Life in General,Mentors,Movie Queue,Prescott College,Summer 2010,The 4-1-1 on Me,Weekend Wrap-Up

Hope you all had a great Memorial Day holiday. 3-day weekends always seem to be so short. And is it just me or does TV suck on week-day holidays? There was nothing good on last night.

Saturday – My intention was to go to Phoenix Comic-Con. John Shneider (I’m a DUKES OF HAZZARD fan) and James Marsters (Spike from BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER)—among other celebs—made an appearance and I’d wanted to get my picture taken with them. But I didn’t want to wait nearly all day to do it. I guess I could’ve gone and just gotten pictures of them. But I didn’t want to deal with paying for parking. Or parking and walking. Because, really, it’s starting to get hotter than a witch’s tittie here, and if I had gotten my pic taken with them, I would’ve been all sweaty and stinky. From the parking and walking, that is. So I skipped it, went to eat at our Usual Place, then went shopping while Babendude hung out with his BF.

I ended up buying a bathing suit.

For $161.

That’s what I get for shopping in Scottsdale. I’d gone to Scottsdale Fashion Square to hit up a particular store: Roxy. But they didn’t have the kind of bathing suits I was looking for: tankinis. I ended up going to Everything But Water and paying $95 for the top and $66 for the little skirted bottom. I, then, of course, end up at Old Navy later (I’m really diggin’ their 2 for $5 flip flops. I’ve not a nice little rainbow of colors. Got a cute sundress, too) and notice their tankinis.

For $12. I think the bottoms were, like $16.50. Or something like that.

I know what you’re saying. “You should’ve waited. DOOFUS!” I know, I know. Needless to say, I’m having buyer’s remorse. Babendude and I went to the same mall yesterday and I should’ve returned it. The tags were cut off, but I still had the receipt.

Anyhoo, to soothe the guilt, I went to see SEX AND THE CITY 2.

Liked the outfits. Almost made me wish I was fashion conscious.

Loved Abudabi. Fabulously beautiful country, but would never want to visit for fear of being kidnapped into a harem or something.

Didn’t like Liza Minelli singing “Single Ladies.” Really could’ve done without hearing/seeing that. Bad enough I get tired of hearing Beyonce sing it, but I really wanted to fast forward this part of the film.

And SJP really isn’t attractive. At all. She’s got man hands. Just sayin’.

Later that night, I watched the saddest. Movie. Ever. Well, maybe not ever, but it was close: MY SISTER’S KEEPER. It’s based off a YA novel by Jodi Piccoult and Lordy, it was a tearjerker. There was nothing happy about this movie. It put you in a constant state of sadness and pissiness (there were a couple of times I wanted to slap Cameron Diaz upside the head). Pass the Kleenex, please.

Sunday – Ate breakfast at the Usual Place, saw PRINCE OF PERSIA (And wow, a buffed-out Jake Gyllenhaal. Wow), bought some Capri pants for work at TJ Maxx, had some ice cream at Baskin Robbins. We used to have one of those near our house and it closed down and was replaced with Thrifty ice cream! *nastyassgenericicecream*. Oh, the horror!

Monday – Breakfast at our Usual Place. I know! Three days in a row. When Ron, the owner, saw us, he laughed and shook his head. He came over and said to me, “Don’t you cook?” “Yes, but we like your breakfast better,” I told him. LOL. Which is why we’re there every weekend. LOL. We walked around the mall and Babendude bought me a couple of pairs of sandals at Shiekh. Buy one get one free. And they gave us the more expensive ones for free. Sweet!

I also got a little head start on homework. The summer session starts in two days and I’ve already got an assignment due on Friday. Ugh! I just ordered books for my Financial Mgmt course last week. LOL. Yeah. My name is Celise, but you can call me Mrs. Procrastination. *sigh* I wasn’t sure if one of the books was going to arrive before the assignment was due, but thank God my mentor, Chantal, was able to loan it to me. I’m used to buying books at BN. I forgot that when you order books on Amazon, you’re sometimes at the mercy of others. *double sigh*.

That’s it for me. How was your weekend? I’m looking forward to the short work week and celebrating my birthday at the water park this weekend (hence the bathing suit purchase). Whoo-hoo! Pics will be posted.

Technorati Tags: Phoenix Comic-Con., John Shneider, DUKES OF HAZZARD, James Marsters, BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER, Scottsdale Fashion Square, Roxy, Everything But Water, Old Navy, SEX AND THE CITY 2., Abudabi, Liza Minelli, Single Ladies, Beyonce, MY SISTER’S KEEPER, Jodi Piccoult, Cameron Diaz, PRINCE OF PERSIA, Jake Gyllenhaal, TJ Maxx, Baskin Robbins, Shiekh, Amazon

April 30, 2010 | "Whoa whoa I gotta go...back to schoooool...again",2nd Semester,3rd Semester,A Whole Latte Trouble,Adv Children's Lit,Book Stuff,Book Two,Creative Writing II,Draven Atreides,Draven Atreides, Teenage Informant Series,Financial Mgmt,Life in General,Mentors,Nonprofit Explorations,Prescott College,School Daze,Spring 2010,Summer 2010,The 4-1-1 on Me

Today officially ends the Spring semester.

I made it through another semester without having a little breakdown.

This is good.

Kristi Edwards, North-Central Region advancement officer for the Arizona Community Foundation, and the Director of the Yavapai County Community Foundation, was my mentor for my Nonprofit Explorations course. The only mentored course I had this semester. Being a newbie in the NP world, she gave me a great overview of the NP sector in general, so now I have a better foundation–no pun intended–for the other courses in my degree plan. She was a wonderful mentor and I look forward to working with her again in the Fall for my Fundraising course.

I turned in my mentor evals and now I’m waiting for them to be signed. I get a whole month off before the Summer session starts. And, unlike my first two semesters, it’s going to be balls-to-the-wall 3 classes up until graduation in Dec next year.

No more whining about feeling overwhelmed.

I’m just going to have to suck it up and remember to breathe.

This summer, I’ll be taking:

~ Creative Writing II: Revising Your Novel mentored by the wonderful Georgia McBride, founder of YALITCHAT. I’m so looking forward to this class because I’ll be working on revising the first 100 pages of DA Book 2. A novel that I finished a while back, and started to edit, and then…stopped. So, it’ll be nice to revisit that story.

~ Advanced Children’s Lit: an online Moodle course through Prescott College

~ Sustainable Financial Mgmt mentored by Chantal Sheehan, COO of local nonprofit New Global Citizens. I met with her this evening and got a really good vibe from her. I think it’s another good mentor/mentee match. This organization is doing wonderful things with youth, so I’m very much looking forward to gleaning all I can from her.

Can’t wait to get started.

Technorati Tags: Kristi Edwards, Arizona Community Foundation, Yavapai County Community Foundation, Georgia McBride, YALITCHAT, Chantal Sheehan, New Global Citizens